Life with Las B...

You are in your third year in the University. At 21, you are only getting to accepting being enlightened and questioning the demands and expectations of culture. You have only begun challenging the norms, stereotypes among others. Today is one of the days allotted for the cultural celebration in your village. It is expected that every woman, especially unmarried ones steer clear of the masquerade to which this day is dedicated to. The consequences varies from merely admonition, or downright thrashing of deviants. "This restriction is not for me," you think. "This is the opportunity for me to expose all of these unprogressive cultural practices. I have to do this, for the future generation not to be caught up with these" In addition to the above is that you are aware that those behind the masks were mere men, mundane mortals whose level of intellectual comprehension is at same level with plebians. You swear that you will not keep silent in the face of opp

This would be your first appearance at the club. An organisation your friend, Kosi swore was for the elites. She said that it was a kind of fraternity and sorority organisation, "Brotherhood and Sisterhood", she called it. You were skeptic, "Which one is fraternity abi Sorority again? In Nigeria ke?" These names were out of place in Nigeria, but she insisted, "Them get plenty guys ooo, rich ones sef. Better people through and through." That seemed to move you. At the point you were in your life, you needed that kind of association, with people of the upper echelon of the society. You asked of the intent of the association, and she replied that it's a circle of the rich, to network and mingle among themselves. She had become a member by proxy on the virtue of being married to a member, so it's wise to say, that she had become a member by association. Your first appearance was the dinner night of the inauguration of a member into the Nati

"These shoes are not where it should be", you lament as a start for the day. Your daughter was supposed to keep them in the racks properly, she never does. You are exhausted with the reprimands, she never registers this in her mind. "Chidiebube, will you come here!" The murmuring of a deviant kid and shuffling of feet pads to your presence. "What's with this? How many times will I remind you that these shoes shouldn't be scattered?" You keep ranting, moving towards her while gesticulating with your hands. She takes a step back and another till she is backed to the wall. She face is buried with her hands because she knows what awaits her. You are angry, 'How dare she seem so unconcerned about your warnings?' You have to teach her a lesson. "Remove that nonsense from your face. Come on, look at me" She heeds your voice, pull out her hands and stares right back at you. You gasp and now, it is your turn to take a step back

I got 'it' as a gift from an acquaintance. She was the hurdle in my workplace. I was lucky enough to be interning in the same department where she was the lead manager. I admired her but my ambition was more than the admiration. I wanted a spot in the company and I wanted it badly. It was 3 months into my internship. My ebullient self was then gaining popularity. Thus, I was hopeful, certain even that I would be retained after my 6 months internship was done. I had completed my NYSC and I figured that I should do the internship instead of doing nothing at home. I loved the office environment, it was busy, hectic, serious and I loved the pressure that came with meeting deadlines. That acquaintance, no, at this time, she was only a role model. It was her approval and recommendation that I needed to be retained at the end of the internship. I had become the darling of almost everyone except her, and I was desperate to have her stamp of approval. She was not giving me the time of t

The Vice Chancellor of a University expelled a student citing some irrelevant reasons. The excuses he gave to the Journalists threw me off balance.  He said that people thought of the University as a breeding place for prostitutes and that the act of Blow Job is abnormal. He further said that the action towards the girl is Discipline, and it is supposed to be therapeutic. Discipline! Really? A tape which was made in privacy was leaked and the reason given for the expulsion of the student is Discipline? Is this some sort of joke? For the life of me, Nigerians have sex all the time. Infact, there is a possibility that the kids of said VC are getting on with it and he cites discipline. Another is that the Stakeholders commended her expulsion. Suddenly, Nigerians are all about purity. How many of the Stakeholders stayed chaste until marriage? How many can swear that they never engaged in Pre-marital sex? Now, they have become champions of morality and purity. VC went on to say that the act

First off, I've been both a plagiarist and a victim. When I graduated from Secondary school, I was a fresh fish on Facebook: accepting friends requests upandan fro. People that I don't know and would probably never know. I was bored, Ignorant (damn You) and of course, was bound to fall prey to all of these them Broadcast messages, "If you don't forward, you'll die or your family will die". I was rebroadcasting till it escalated to just forwarding posts that I found in groups that I belonged to. Most times, it was stories to keep my class group chat busy. Sometimes, I wrote "Copied". One day, a Facebooker was complaining about Plagiarism and I asked my sister a stupid question, "Why is she angry though, the person is just helping to spread the message naa" Then, I didn't know what Plagiarism is, I've never heard the word. I didn't even know that it was a crime and when my sister pointed that out to me, I was scared. Someone might

YOU DON'T ONLY NEED TO GET YOUR CLIENTS/CUSTOMERS TO KNOW HOW THE BUSINESS IS OF ADVANTAGE TO THEM, YOU'VE GOT TO RELATE WITH THEM ON A PERSONAL LEVEL. ESPECIALLY IF IT IS A PURCHASING ENDEAVOUR. Mayhaps, you are looking for a customer to sell your products or skills and you've just been advertising your wares and not getting the response you want. It's always better and easier to get to know the potential customer/client first, before shoving your wares in their faces. Here's my experience. I'm part of the Editoral committee of the Rotaract Club of my school and we are in the process of publication of our brochure/magazine. As such, we needed funds in form of subscription by fellow Rotaractors. I was delegated to convince them to subscribe to the brochure with a token. What I was busy doing for weeks was "Composing beautiful messages of how the magazine is being published, and what they stand to gain from the magazine" Yet, I wasn&#

You'd never know how disheartening a "No" from a potential customer/client is until you're on the receiving end. My place abode while in school is the hostel and students usually hawk their wares from room to room. The message always goes thus, "I have slippers for sale" or "I have your natural black soap for sale" et cetera.  Then, my answer could either go this way: If the person knocks and says "I have slippers for...." "I'm not interested", I'd always interrupt midway.  If it was any of my roommates that answered, they would allow the person to advertise her wares and then comment on how pretty it is before regretfully announcing that they weren't buying. As for me, I would tell my roomies that I didn't see the point, so my being blunt about my lack of interest. "Why waste someone's time if you aren't buying in the first place?" Fast-forward to a few months later. My sister had begun baking

Home? What is your definition of home? I'd like to say first that the idea I agree with most is "that home is where the heart is" Only where the heart is Picture this! A 5 bedroom bungalow that is beige tiled, with almaco windows and iron doors. A bouncy caramel  couch in the parlour, a 40" flat screen television, 3 pairs of recreation, a wide space outside. The tiles is mobbed everyday without fail, although some rooms are not even used The children of the landlord hardly sits on the couch, except for prayers, yet it is cleaned everytime The television is never used for entertainment by the children of the Landlord, The compound is swept daily unfailingly,  The children hardly exchanges words with their father, apart from greetings In a nutshell, the house feels strange to the children of the landlord Another scenario, a 3 bed room flat, 24" television, no tiles, just an average flat. In this case, the children returns home, always even the married ones The who

While the Sexual harassment issue is trending, I'd like to talk a bit on Sexual Abuse, and rape and the reality that many people, citizens of Nigeria do not take Sexual Abuse serious. Maybe it is due to the fact there is no enough sensitisation on the issue, which can be attributed to the fact that Nigerians perceive sex as such a Sacred topic, a taboo to talk about. This means that to an average Nigerian, stories and news on Sex is viewed in an abstract form. Sexual abuse, therefore tend to get sidelined. The truth is that people know it happens, stories spread but few people willingly ever comes out to share their experiences. In a situation whereby it is difficult for the females to speak up, it is more difficult for the male gender to speak up. Since I was posting on the #SexForGrades on my status, 2 of my Friends had dmed me to ask why I was so sentimental to things that pertains to the female gender. I was shocked that such question was thrown at me. For one, I am female,

An EPISTLE.... I was birthed with mom losing pines of blood I looked like a wretched lizard at birth , probably because the cruel world didn't want me here BUT GOD WANTED ME. I was raised in an uncompleted building. Mama did a whole lot of things which didn't tamper her virtue but exceeded the strength of her fragile hands just to see us survive. Pops was broke, I mean it. He was constantly looking for a way out. He turned an errand boy for guys who kinda saw d light of few pennies. But we kept on pressing. He had to bend his ego and squeezed his pride into tiny fragments just to give my 5 brothers and I, the life we've got now. Trust me i didn't have d feeling of a copper spoon so most times i wonder what a big deal silver spoon would be. But thank God for Moms,  she taught us a song the Song of Jabez, make me a Better me Lord. It kept us going. It was a fuel to our fire. She fasted, starved and as dark skinned as she was, her knees got knuckle because

A documentary was released yesterday titled "Sex for Grades". As the implies, it follows up a secret investigation in Nigeria Universities on lecturers whom many people have alleged harassed them sexually. Now, first I should start by saying that I commend the lead reporter for the documentary, Kiki Mordi. Apparently, she experienced Sexual abuse in her first year in the University. It even made her drop outta School. I must confess that I really applaud her for the efforts she made in taking part of the investigation. Also, to the reporters who were brave enough to go undercover and pose as students, It's actually a huge feat. Now, on to the sexual abuse, I really have no words. Personally, I have not had any experiences of that sort and I definitely do not want to undergo such. For one, it's an infringement of ones fundamental human right. The case of sexual harassment or advancement from lecturers, or even anyone in authority does not anyone a choice. It's l

I believe in Football and the impact it has had on my life. For me Football have always been more than just a game to play with friends. To me Football was everything, I had Football posters, Football pillow cases, watched Football movies. My whole life revolved around Football. I’ve been consumed by it since the day I was born. When I was young I was like any other kid except for I have always been short and until about age 11 I was skinny as a twig. These two faults in my genetic make up made it so it was hard for me to do some things I wanted to do. My favorite sport had always been football, but due to my size I did not meet the size requirements to play. So because of that I had to play other sports such as Dodgeball and Relay. Even as a child I knew playing these sports would only make me better, but mainly i just wanted to play football. Even though I was not always motivated to play these sports they had taught me a key element that would be necessary later in football and la

I weep! I read a post on Facebook about the experiences of Nigerians abroad, and the circumstances that they are forced to resort to just to get permanent residence or asylum from a foreign country. So Apparently, from the post, the affected guy had to resort to pretending to be gay and undergoing test in form of having sexual relations with a man from there, so as to prove that indeed he wasn't lying. The partner that he had claimed previously, had decided not to go through same process and was forced to return to Nigeria whilst he was able to get his papers. Not only is the above situation appalling but also the fact that Nigerians are forced to act unlike themselves because they are not safe in their country. There is no hope for them and probably, they are in search for opportunities so as to feed their families. Most times I wonder how and why we got to this extent. I weep, so hard for my country. As cliché as it sounds, the future seems bleak no matter how someone looks

Firstly, I am not a rich kid My family are living on average I very much cannot afford some certain things that I would have loved to! But it's okay It's some sort of motivation To know that I should hustle and make something for myself Although I talk about tryna doing something for myself, it's difficult when I have not found something to do! People tell me that I should be a writer But it's difficult knowing fully well that I am not a fiction writer As of the moment, I cannot imagine a fictional character and flaws to save my life My vocabulary aren't even that developed I still struggle over some words It's hard when you know you are searching for something but you don't know what it is Arguably, when I speak People claim I use big English Mayhaps, it is the intonation I have made out for myself Regardless, I am not where I want to be I have not done much with my life Though I'm still 19, but time isn't necessarily by my side.

I was en route to my department for my first class and I took the path of the Venue for the Post Utme . Those writing today are Medicine students and by God, they are quite larger than other days. The ride through which most were conveyed t o the University were stationed along the road and even in front of the hostel closest to the library. The candidates were lined up and parents were fussing over their kids, reminding them of their reprinting slips, jamb slips, passports, and whatnots. I could see the awe of the school in some of the candidates eye. Afterall, I was in their shoes a couple of years ago. The University would be looking like a brand new world for them. They'd have been thinking that they got into this brand new world that is so huge. Truthfully, It's another world, and seems big. However, it's not actually as big as it had been on the first day of arrival. Soon, if one got admitted, everywhere becomes familiar with everything. The crowd today had been

As a young adult, or new adult still navigating her way through the world. It's imperative that one associates oneself with an organization or more than encourages and motivates one to be better version of oneself. I have been finding them and aligning myself with what will project me, what will motivate me to do more, better than where I would have been, had I chosen to go solo. You find where there are community of like minds, in the same range as you are, via studentship and more so, working towards something that will benefit, not just the individual but the society. As an aspiring Enactor, I'd say that ENACTUS is one of those organisations. It's stands for ENtrepreneural ACTion for others, creating a better world for US all. A head for business and a heart for all is the mandate by which the association lives by. Having established that, ENACTUS UNN TEAM is organising a 2 day program which is tagged Leadership, Career and Capacity development. It is from 23rd to

I did my presentation today, On one of the sensitive topics in the world, Nigeria to be precise. Nope, not  gender. Religion! And Women! Because I am a woman, I was very particular about the verses that subjugates women. On how we are not given as much authority as the male gender in the Church setting. Now a friend whilst contributing made mention of how majority of the laws were directed towards the society of that time. And I'm like, Yesss! It is true but why are those doctrines still targeted towards women of this present generation. Which was why I said,to get rid of those verses that oppress women Currently. If Slavery and Incest, and gazillion other laws are abomination these days, I don't know why the same is not directed towards the issue of the female sex. Another pointed out why we don't talk about the roles of women via Rev. Sisters and I'm like, why are women not ordained to run they church. One was insisting that ordination does not eq

My sister fried chin-chin yesterday. This is the first time I'm a part of preparing the bakeries for more than a decade. Then, we always made chin-chin for Christmas. That was the main Christmas snack. My mother would indulge us in preparing the barter. I didn't exactly knew what was being used, but I was the helping hand. What I remember vividly is that after mixture of the barter, we would use a smooth bottle instead of a Rolling pin to spread the barter. Every one of is was assigned a barter and a bottle to dice. I would be busy eating from my barter and tryna make the diced barter to be as equal as possible. I was also reprimanded for eating the barter, but could you blame me? It was tasty From there, my mom would start frying the already diced barter and I would be hovering around the kitchen seeking to get a taste before it's fully done. My mother would shout for us to get away before there would be an accident. Soon, the chin-chin would be done, with a little giv

There's something about dressing that people make up impressions because of a mode of dressing. About a week ago, I went to market with my friends. We were just strolling on the pathways to get to the market proper, the okada men were beckoning on us. One said something that struck me, he was like"Come, let me take you to Old Caro, shebi that's where you're going" Old Caro is Old Carolina, A hotel within the vicinity. It's one of the most popular places for Hangouts by University students. The man probably thought that I'm meeting up with someone at the hotel. Now, I've Never been to Old Caro, nothing has ever taken me there. Maybe, I'm not living the supposed life to the fullest, but I've never had the pull towards the hotel for anything. So, I am thinking of the reason the man thought such. I was putting on a fitted top, mum's jeans, canvas and packed my hair with white handkerchief. My lips were a darkish shade of pink. That was all.

You'd never notice a difference until you make a move. You'd never be known until you decide that you do something that will project you I am someone who doesn't talk, not that I don't know how to talk. I just do not talk, it's not in my nature. Some people call it introversion, and whatnots. The fact is, I stay on my own, I observe and that's it. I went for a fellowship last week Sunday and a debate was ongoing. When the opportunity for input came up, I didn't raise my hands, neither did I make an effort to contribute. I had gazillions of things to say, and it was about a minute given to each person so I decided to stay mum. On my way back to the hostel, I was busy chastising myself, well not exactly, I was imagining a different scenario where I had answered. I told myself that, I'd better be doing something, unless I will continue being invisible in the fellowship until I graduate. So, yesterday I said I was going to move the motion. Now moving moti

I went to visit a friend and the mom was watching a video. It was a Dubai man who was saying something about Nigeria. He mentioned that Nigeria has got the better resources, than Dubai and all. That, what puts Dubai at advantage is better leadership, rulers with the interest of the citizens, wise people. The above is not wrong at all. What puts us behind is the fact that there is gross mismanagement and disruption in the way the administration should go. I do not know the correct form of governance to be used, but I'm well aware that the one Nigeria is currently practicing is not it. No wonder Plato advises that only Philosophers be King. The state of leadership of this country is appalling. I do not know where to start admonition and I don't know how safe it is for one to make a free speech. However, I've got to write what I feel. Most especially for me as a youth in this country. There are no opportunities for someone like me. If there was any, it's something that

Today was something else. Tiring but well spent. (8/8/2019) My first class by 7, and we ran to Political science Dept as it was raining. I didn't really stay through the lectures, it was occupied. I took some shots cos I felt I was dressing cool and all. From there, I went back to the department and my friends and I decided to go to the market to measure the clothes my friends and I would wear for our departmental night. On reaching to the market, to the shop where we could buy materials. Ifechukwu and I bargained for the price. I surprised myself the more with how vocal I was about selection of the material to wear and the bargaining. From there, we got to the place where we measured the clothes, we received biscuits from the people on the line as one was celebrating birthday. It was there I learnt my cloth size as I hadn't measured in a while. We were en route coming back and Ifechukwu saw a place where "bell" was open. She saw an opportunity to buy cloth she w

I was overhearing this movie that my roommates were watching and from the dialogues, it's the same ole cliche story of how a woman who could not cook fell in love. Then, the man left her. In a bid to be a wife material, she told her neighbor and paid a whooping sum of 250,000 naira, just to learn how to cook. Not just that, the over exaggerating lack of knowledge about the kitchen and lack of common Sense by same person. Like, what the fuck? What on Earth is Nigeria movies teaching? The truth is that when I was younger, movies like those bothered me Because we (as women) were supposed to be aiming for a man's house And I absolutely was not someone who likes to cook, (though it's a basic necessity) But the pressure was there The need to know that your yards of wife material was increasing That aside, my thoughts throughout the period I heard the film airing was "Who the fuck wrote this?" Why do Nigeria keep doing this atrocious movies in this 21st century

(This is a piece, I wrote about a month ago and I've been chickening out of posting it. Now, I'm like, Fuck that! Do that which is pushing your boundaries) It was my first time in the gathering I felt like I was thrown in wolves pack You stood up There was this aggressiveness that you exuded You were all speeches and spices You were all fierceness and fairness All strict and discipline Saying that I was mesmerized by you is an understatement My eyes were following you around the room I was watching your steps and interaction with people I wanted to know you I wanted you to know me Actually, I hadn't noticed the gentleness about you You only reminded me of tall, dark and handsome Both in the literal and figurative sense Tall. Dark. Handsome I wanted all I wanted it all I didn't know how that will happen I wanted to know your name I wanted to know what you did I wanted everything Still want everything On another day, I saw you You were walking to

Few years ago, I was bemoaning the fact that our Nigeria presence was close to zero on Wikipedia, especially of people. I was shocked because there were quite a few records of Nigerians, even the popular ones. I didn't know how the whole stuff worked. I was aware that there were numerous interviews about the popular people online, or even them revealing things about themselves on interviews. However, in recent times, there's been some sort of change. That's a progress, a huge progress and I love it. Still on the progress, I was able to find out that I can be an editor on Wikipedia. It is accepted to be an editor of a page on Wiki. I am excited that I am making a change, no matter how little. So, my aim is to pen down stuffs, of which I confirm as authentic and be uploading them on the Wiki pages of popular people. I'm trying to be engaging in many things at once, being a part of something. Enjoying the process of making the contents, having something that I'm do

In recent times, what is evident in the world is a situation of melancholy. Although, melancholy can be said to be an emotion worth experiencing, sometimes the society is what induces the melancholic state in which a person is stuck with. When defining what a society entails, one is left in turmoil as to how to go about overcoming the supposed notion of being under societal expectations. While a person defines the society as a community made up of individuals from different parts of the world, the truth is a little bit far-fetched from that. Society influences humans almost every single time. It tends to be inconspicuous at times owing to the fact that some people can be rigid on their stand. However, the situation of the current society makes it nearly impossible to be isolated. The peak of society puts up its head in the form of social media. At this time and age, social media can be loosely translated to the society. Someone said something about the direction in which the world

So, I went to a burial with a friend to aid her with serving elder people. We were seated in a corner with her mom and the next thing I saw, one woman brought back a plate with meat inside. I couldn't keep up with the conversation because of the Nsukka Igbo they were communicating in. After she left, I asked my friend what she was talking about and it was that she returned the meat because apparently, women do not eat gizzard in the village. While I am not surprised about the culture at all, Sometimes I find it hard to believe that people still keep to certain traditions. No, I don't understand the whole concept not eating what has been offered to me, by someone who is very much aware of same tradition. My guess was that the culture is strictly adhered to from the part of the village that she comes from. I should add that I ate gizzard in same event and I am not seeing it affecting anyone. Infact, I've always been eating gizzard. Although it is left for my father, He st

We don't know what we have until we lose it. I had written something down on this particular issue, and that had been a depressing stuff. However, the one I'm emphasising on today is actually more stupid than sad, although I'm very sad about it. From my first year, I had prided myself in it having subscribed a monthly data plan by myself while school is in session. It's not difficult to guess the reason for my boasting, WI-FI, my very own "Lionet WiFi". Then, YouTube and Instagram was my second home. I dallied a bit on WhatsApp and Facebook, but my base was YouTube. I knew the latest songs that were released, the trending ones and the views each was getting. It went as far as checking the comments in each video. This girl didn't know that my WiFi will be stripped from me without warning. It was like the Biblical saying of Jesus coming like a thief at night, I guess the WiFi stopped working at night. I am not too sure. My very own WiFi. I was downloadin

A couple of months ago, the trend "School na Scam" was really trending online. One might have even thought about dropping out off school with the popularity that the trend got online and offline. Sometimes when people take on to following some certain trends, one can not help but understand why and where they got such from. Nigeria is a country where it's basically survival of the fittest. That is both in literal and in the figurative sense. It's not easy to climb to the top, not only is it not easy, several other factors still drag someone deeper into failure. The state of the country leaves people competing for a particular position starting from the academic level to every other sector of the society. With that, one pays attention to how important academics actually is in shaping the future of a young adult in the Society. How important is academics? It is not all the time that a person succeeds academically, the sad reality is that succeeding academically in N