Notions (Sensitisation)

While the Sexual harassment issue is trending, I'd like to talk a bit on Sexual Abuse, and rape and the reality that many people, citizens of Nigeria do not take Sexual Abuse serious.

Maybe it is due to the fact there is no enough sensitisation on the issue, which can be attributed to the fact that Nigerians perceive sex as such a Sacred topic, a taboo to talk about. This means that to an average Nigerian, stories and news on Sex is viewed in an abstract form. Sexual abuse, therefore tend to get sidelined. The truth is that people know it happens, stories spread but few people willingly ever comes out to share their experiences.

In a situation whereby it is difficult for the females to speak up, it is more difficult for the male gender to speak up.

Since I was posting on the #SexForGrades on my status, 2 of my Friends had dmed me to ask why I was so sentimental to things that pertains to the female gender. I was shocked that such question was thrown at me. For one, I am female, so obviously I am very sensitive when it comes to my gender

The second person went on to list how people exchange sex for a lot of things and on how Grading should be different. He also pointed out that it happens to the male gender.

As I went on in discussion with him, I realised that he hadn't even watched the documentary, and was only following the tweets on Twitter. I tried to give him a rundown of what happened and how the documentary does not correlate with transactional sex among other things.

The difference lies in the fact that the lecturers are coming from a place of authority, they can make or Mar a student. It would be a different case if the  student had intentionally met up with the lecturer for favours. Infact, that was totally not the documentary was about.

We are talking about a scenario whereby a lecturer, who is supposed to inculcate knowledge into a student demands for sex unless she will keep carrying over the course as long as the lecturer pleases.

My annoyance with my friend was that he kept insisting on how same happens to boys and of course brings in Feminism to the topic. He said that Feminism is the reason I was so defending my gender that way. On how if it was a guy, nobody would believe him.

I had decided to disassociate myself with political labels, ideologies and labels at this point in my life. I definitely do not want to be giving an adult the basics of Feminism at all. I reminded him that the sheer fact that men are not listened to when they tell their abuse stories is among what Feminism is enlightening people.

I think it's ignorance that makes people Yap all sorts of things. Especially, whenever they want to relate Feminism with anything. It is purely common sense to post things that are wrong, to take a stand. I rightfully advised that he start a thread on the male issue if he knows people who have been abused and call me out if I don't back him up. I was shocked when he said that I should start the trend. On how I will start a thread without evidence, on just speculation, when guys never tell their stories.

Unfortunately, it is because it is perceived by the society as a lack of masculinity, or weakness if a man says out loud that he is abused, or raped.

My friend went on to say that there wasn't this outcry when Suicide was in Vogue among youths.
Seriously, I don't even know the reason I allowed the conversation to drag on as it did. Kiki Mordi, waited 16 years after her abuse to do a documentary. She grew stronger after all those years, whilst the suicide just took place a few months ago.

Of course, I am not undermining the seriousness of Depression, It is something that should be put into consideration in people. However, Rape has always existed since in Tertiary Universities, even Secondary schools.
I have read women on Facebook in their 40s and 50s who have experienced sexual abuse one way or the other. Especially through the threat and ultimatum of academia in school.

Yes, Abuse happens to both genders but it's more prominent in the Females which is why it is addressed most. It's just like "Black Lives Matter" and "All Lives Matter".
Nobody is disputing the fact that whites do not experience injustice on their land, but the reality is that blacks undergo that a hell lot more than whites, prompting the movement.

My friend wasn't talking or saying I was sentimental when I was posting "The Central Park Five". He never protested when I posted on Jean Botham and Amy Gugyer issue. He gbammed with me, because he is black. He didn't remind me of the whites issues, from blacks or even poor white men's issue from the system, because he is black.

But because he is not female, he is telling me that I should be gender neutral when making decisions. I would have written that I wanted lesser punishment for the police woman since she is female.

I just needed to vent this out here.
As a female and as a black, I am heavily at a disadvantage, not only from the system but the society. And if talking about it makes me sentimental, I'd rather be a fucking sentimentalist. I don't give a Fuck!