On Marriage pressure

A family friend reached out to my brother and said - 

"Gị na daddy unu nọ ebe a, chọọ Ị hapụ ụmụnne unu nwaanyị ka ha nọdụ na be unu kaa nká"

Translation - That he and my father are sitting back, without doing anything as the females remain married

She even suggested places to go for spiritual consultation.

My brother really struggled with the right response for a respected family friend and ended up replying with just a greeting.

The thing with the older generation is that they truly do believe that marriage is the pinnacle of it all, specifically for women

My father, thankfully, has never badgered me for marriage other than, "don't go and entangle with someone from faraway. I can't travel on longer routes now that I am older"

But the whole marriage incitement is an epidemic. 

When Nigerians say "marry early," it usually boils down to these arguments -

1. So you'll look like your kids' sibling instead of their parent

2. You don't want to be 60 and be going to be for PTA meeting

3. So you can see your grand kids and great grandkids

Those are all viable options. However:

- You can actually get married and not have the so-desired kids cos life ain't that straightforward 

- Child bearing is not inherently tied to marriage

- Why should I even want to look like my kids sibling?

- If it's maintaining body weight, I've seen 60 year olds that look stunning.

I can go on and on with more. 

But the most important reason out of all the above is this - "I'm just not ready to settle down"

And that is enough valid answer. The point is this...

There is no good enough justification why people should pressure others to marry.

I honestly do believe they push the marriage, not necessarily for the sake of their children but because they want to brag among their peers.

That is the only reason why you're pressuring your daughter who is 22 or even 25 years to marriage

Suppose we all envision for marriage to be a successful one, it means that if someone lives up to 70 years, and they got married at 22, they'd be tied to the same spouse for 45 years?

It's not a bad thing though. But I believe people, especially women, should have a decade of their 20s to themselves... Before being committed to a marital status.