Notions (An Ode to my Brother)

First off, I am jubilating that I have repaired my laptop, by myself. Took a bit intensive browsing from Google to YouTube and I got it right. Of course, my brother holds the accolades for that. He more or less made us marry Google as young as 10 years old.

See eh, if I can raise a child. A boy child like my brother, then I have made it in life, periodttt. This ain't no child's play, I've simply made it. What I am, my journey and my values, I owe implicitly to Him and his upbringing of us. Responsibility, Integrity, Meticulousness, Uprightness most of the virtues y'all perceive is Peculiar to Chinenye, I learnt from him

I remember once then, when we were having a discussion. I was probably 12 or 13 and I commented about smoking and if he did that. He looked at me quite dumbfounded that I even asked the silly question and he said, "anything I don't do in this house, best believe that I won't do it anywhere else."

And by God, y'all don't understand how significant that question is. Cos guy could have done anything and I mean, fucking anything in our house. For one, mom was dead, dad was not in the country, he is the eldest and he is male which means he had the liberty to do anything. He didn't do nothing, anything that makes his character questionable.

Nothing!

The sacrifices that this guy have done, not just for me but my immediate is just too many to handle. Then, in secondary school, Dude would legit drop everything he is doing in school and come back for our mid-term break or long vacation. The ones that are too extreme, I will go over to his school.

And bear in mind this is Igbariam oo, that gives plenty wahala. Visiting days, he was there all the damn fucking time. Feddy girls been know him then naa, Chinenye's Brother who never fails to visit and on time. N'oge.

My JSS 1 and 2 was even hectic for him cos he'd come back from Igbariam to our house at Nkwelle. Visit me first, visit my sister schooling at Nkpor before going back to school.

Same brother that makes sure that every fucking necessity we need, we had it. Dude legit bought me a camera phone at 12 heard old and it's not as if I requested for it. This is a person that could have easily hoarded the transfers my father makes, but no! He saw to every need.

My close friends would notice that I never lack vital stuffs or run out of them cos I always plan ahead. It was from him that I learnt that, my brother won't ever be caught unawares with emergencies, especially ones he can avoid. And believe me, I've quickly tapped onto that.

Lemme not talk about the life lessons I've learnt from him, my perceptions of the church (hell) and how he more or less concurred to that perception. I just told him, "See yeah, I don't believe in this whole hell brouhaha. Too different versions of Christianity, no unity and contradictory opinions." He said he's been reasoning same thing, that the whole hell bullshit is to dictate to people.

This is a person I was praying for in my younger days cos he didn't exactly follow us to church. Dude have seen so much, had so much responsibility on his shoulders that he didn't just go to church, but that didn't exempt him from making us to go. His own is that we would go and it is mandatory that on our return we tell him what we learnt from the service.

My brother never picks my call, not even when he has recharged and I am calling to thank him. He'd busy it and call me right back.

Amarachi asked me once, that I like my brother too much. What if he marries someone who doesn't like me.

I was like, "If he genuinely loves this person and he is happy, I'd fucking get out of his lair. I won't butt in cos dude deserves a whole bout of happiness all through his life."

When I was still extremely religious, I would always tell God, "See, if it comes to matter of heaven and you were to make a choice between my brother and I, I'd rather he goes to heaven. I wouldn't mind going to hell on his behalf."

So yeah to the fuck yeah. Last year I told him, "See eeh, you know all these things you use to do is not your responsibility. It's not your duty to carry all our needs on your head. And I appreciated him for all he had done for us."

Dude legit replied, "Training the two of you have been my greatest achievement."

I was stunned. I am still stunned.

I Count my blessings and upbringing, but I count my brothers own infinitesimally. I'd never stop counting it ever. 

So yeah. Accolades to my late mum for raising his eldest child that way. I can only pray that I do same for my son...

Nah, he isn't just my MCE, he is my HumanCrushEverySinglePassingMoment.